staying

"Martha, Martha," Jesus said, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.  Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." (Luke 10:41-42)

This morning I had a bit of an epiphany, which is totally appropriate given the season, I suppose.  I realized that I normally do not have trouble coming to Jesus to sit at his feet and listen to what he says, as Mary did, I just have trouble staying there.  Even when I am worried and upset about many things, as Martha was (and as I am pretty regularly), I know the answer--take it all to Jesus.  My problem is that once I take it to Jesus, and find some measure of comfort and presence and peace, I do not stay there.  I allow my anxieties to lure me back into the dark country of fear and angst once again.  My problem is not in the coming, but in the staying.  I guess that's why Jesus went to such great lengths in John 15 to tell us the spiritual value of staying (abiding).  Coming is easy, but staying is much more difficult.

"Why do you allow anxiety and fear to constantly beat the hell out of you?" he asks.  "You know the answer.  You know the way to peace and love.  And yet, so often you don't go there, or stay there.  Come to me; that is the beginning.  That is the easier part.  For when you come, I will meet you with my love and affection and care.  But don't just come, that is only a small part of the battle.  You must also stay.  So often you come, but you do not stay with me, even though I am always with you.  You turn right around and allow anxiety to lure, or to drag, you back into a dark and fearful land.  Come to me, and stay with me, then you will know--and live inside of--my peace.  For you will be living in me, even as I live in you.  

eyes

In the spiritual life, where we fix our eyes is everything.  If we allow our eyes—and thus, our hearts—to be consumed by our own surroundings and struggles and circumstances, we are in for one wild ride.  But if we are able, by God’s grace and strength, to fix our eyes on the bigger picture, and not on whatever trouble we may be experiencing at the moment—if we are able to take out eyes off of ourselves and fix them on Jesus—then everything changes.  Oh, the circumstances themselves may not change much, but the spirit we have in the midst of those circumstances, and our quality of life as a result, will change immensely.  I guess that’s why the scriptures talk so much about it:  I lift my eyes to you, to you whose throne is in heaven. (Psalm 123:1)  So we fix our eyes not on what is see, but on what is unseen.  For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:18)  Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (Hebrew 12:2-3)

It is really not that complicated—in theory at least.  But it is a little more difficult in practice.  For when my eyes are consumed with myself, and my little life and my little world, I find that I am filled with insecurity, anxiety, and fear.  It is a downward spiral that is incredibly difficult to break free from.  I don’t know about you, but I have the tendency get stuck inside myself at times.  But when I am finally able to fix my eyes on God instead, something beautiful happens within me.  Somehow he gives me the ability to climb out of the dark pit of self and come into the light of love.  It is an invitation that is always open to me.  “Look at me,” says my God, “and you will be able to experience the joy and the life and the peace that I desire for you, rather than trying so hard to provide it for yourself.”  I pray that he will give us all the grace to do that more and more.


O God, sometimes I get stuck inside myself, consumed with my own life.  When I do this my life is filled with insecurity, anxiety, and fear.  But you want more for me.  Fix my eyes on you, O Lord.  Let love conquer insecurity, let peace replace anxiety, and let trust overcome fear.  In the name of Jesus I pray.  Amen.

truth

It seems like a significant part of living the life of faith involves trying to figure out which voices to listen to.  It can be really confusing.  There are so many different voices vying for our attention these days, both within us and around us.  At times it can be really hard to figure out which ones are telling the truth.  The problem is that often the voices in our lives that are most dominant and prevalent are the very ones that are least reliable. 

Therefore, it is imperative that we figure out how to give space for the good voices (truth) to take root and shape within us, while minimizing the space and the impact of the bad (lies).  But telling the lies from the truth can be difficult.  Sometimes the differences are very subtle, and their arguments very convincing.  We can easily get sucked into believing some things are true simply because it feels like or seems like they are.  But looks (and feelings) can be deceiving.  We need much more than that.  We need something more substantial, something more solid and stable. 

That is where the Word comes in.  And that is where the practice of immersing ourselves in the Word of Truth comes in.  If we are continually immersing ourselves in the truth, then it will be a lot easier to recognize the lies when they come a long, no matter how convincing they are.

Jesus is a perfect example of this.  On the glorious day of his baptism he hears the voice of his Father speaking the beautiful truth of who he is: “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well-pleased.”  (Matthew 3;17)  And immediately after that he is led into the desert to be confronted with the other voices, voices that are trying to get him to believe something very different from that.  Voices that are trying to get him to doubt the truth of who he is.  “If you are the Son of God,” they whisper, “then prove it.”

But Jesus is not swayed by the lies.  Why?  Because we knew the truth.  Just listen to the way he answers each of the three temptations.  He answers each with the words: “It is written.”  Jesus was so familiar with the Voice of Truth that he was easily able to differentiate it from the subtle lies of the enemy.  And if we are to have any hope of being victorious in that same battle, we must do the same.  We must immerse ourselves in the Word of Truth so that we can be able to identify and overcome the lies of the enemy.  For if we “abide in his word, we are truly his disciples, and we will know the truth, and the truth will set us free.” (John 8:32)  Let’s not delay, our freedom is at stake.

O God, I must confess that at times it is easy to believe the lies because they are so loud and so prevalent within and around me.  Help me, instead, to listen to your voice and to believe your Truth.  And help that Truth to set me free.  Amen.

new years

o lord, in this new year
help me to be more concerned

with being than with doing
with what you want than with what i want
with loving than with judging
with making myself nothing than with trying to be something

with descending than with ascending

with obscurity than with notoriety

with being hidden than with being seen

with serving than with being served

with compassion than with competition

with contentment than with comparison

with fruitfulness than with productivity

with the things of god than with the things of this world

with what you think than with what others think
with making you awesome than with making me awesome
with growing smaller than with becoming larger
with being least than with being the greatest

with the one thing than with the many things
with silence than with noise
with giving than with having
with your kingdom than with my own

this is my new years prayer

emptied

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.  And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death--even death on a cross. (Philippians 2:5-8)

Have this mind among yourselves, which was also in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.  And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even on a cross. (ESV)

But made himself of no reputation, and took on the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men. (KJV)

But stripped himself of all privilege by consenting to be a slave by nature and being made a mortal man. (JBP)

Gave up his divine privileges. (NLT)

Set aside the privileges of deity. (MSG)

He poured himself out. (The Voice)

No matter how you look at it, what Jesus did by coming to earth is simply beyond comprehension.  We can't even begin to fathom a descent of that magnitude; especially in a world that is hell-bent on ascending.  Yet, that is the mystery of the season; God became man and made his dwelling among us.  God lowered, emptied, stripped, gave up, let go of, or poured out, depending on your translation.  And all of those words together do not really even begin to scratch the surface. 

But God did not just stop there.  Now he calls each of us, his people, to do the same.  He calls us to be more and more like him.  He tells us that our attitudes, and our practices, should be the same as his.  He tells us that somehow, some way, in our daily lives, we must practice the art of emptying ourselves, because that is what he did.  Because that is who he is.  We, his followers, must constantly be seeking how and where and when and to whom he desires for us to pour ourselves out for the sake of Love.  What will that look like for each of us in the days and weeks and months--and year--ahead?  That is the real question of the season. 

becoming

and the child grew
and became strong;
he was filled with wisdom
and the grace of God
was upon him. (Luke 2:40)

you came as a babe
not a full grown man
and then you had to become

there were no short cuts
even for you
it was a long slow work
this growing and strengthening

why would we
expect it to be
any different for us

why should we be
exempt from the journey
of becoming

christmastide

But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.  (Luke 2:19)

It is amazing to me, after all of the gifts are opened and all of the food is eaten and all of the visitors have departed, how quickly we can leave it all behind and shift right back into our normal modes of operation.  Christmas has come and gone, and we are already off to the next thing. 

I guess that's why the church fathers and mothers realized that we needed more time and space to consider the mystery and the truth and the significance of what really happened.  Thus, Christmastide was born; that period of time following Christmas Day in which we are invited to make time and space for reflection and silence and prayer.  It is a time when we pull up a chair (or a bale of hay) to the manger and join the Holy Family as we all welcome, in wonder and amazement, God into our very midst.  It is a time when we join Mary as she takes it all in and treasures all of these things up in her heart.  It is a time to sit and savor and enjoy and ponder and celebrate the coming of the Light into this dark world.  It is a time when we welcome the newborn King into his kingdom. 

So do not rush off quite yet.  Do not jump back into your busy schedules and many obligations, but take some time to just linger around the stable.  Sit beside the manger.  Hear the angels voices.  Watch as shepherds and wise men and old priests offer gifts and prayers and prophesies to the One for whom they have long waited and watched and yearned.  Adore the One who has come among us, the One whose heart would not allow him to stay far away, but wanted forever to be know as God with us--Emmanuel.  And finally, let us pay careful attention to how God has been born anew within us and among us, to treasure it up, to ponder it in our hearts, and bask in his glory.