conversion

“Follow me and I will make you fishers of men.” (Mark 1:17) Jesus is not merely looking for cooperation; he’s looking for conversion.  He wants all of us, not just a part.  Thus, conversion is not just something that happens once in our lives, but something that happens over and over again. Each conversion moving us deeper and deeper into the heart and life of God. 

There are all kinds of conversions.  There is the initial conversion from being lost to being found, but that conversion is followed by numerous others as we surrender our lives and our hearts more fully to Jesus.  There is the conversion from fear to love, from competition to compassion, from independence to dependence, from performing to grace, from clenched fists to open hands, and from bondage to freedom, just to name a few.

Conversion happens when we encounter God in an intimate and powerful way.  A threshold is crossed in which we realize that our lives will never be the same.  There is no going back to the way things were before.

That’s what Jesus was inviting Simon and Andrew and James and John into, and there would be plenty more to follow.  And it is what Jesus is inviting us into as well.  What kind of conversion is Jesus inviting you into these days?  What does it look like?  What does it demand of you?  What is it offering you?  What must you leave behind in order to follow him?

Lord Jesus, you are not asking for my cooperation, but for my conversion.  It is not a question but a calling, and I need to hear it as such.  Help me to encounter you in such a deep and intimate way that it changes everything about me.  Then I cannot not follow you.   

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contemplation and ecstasy

“When they saw the star, they rejoiced exceedingly with great joy.  And going into the house, they saw the child with Mary his mother, and they fell down and worshipped him.” (Mt. 2:10-11, ESV) 

When was the last time you rejoiced exceedingly with great joy?  When was the last time you rejoiced exceedingly with great joy simply because you were in the presence of the Lord?  These two questions made me realize something today.  They made me realize that my prayers have become far too transactional.  I rush into God’s presence, listen for a few minutes, and then start asking God to intervene in the lives of the people and in the familiar places that are near and dear to me.  Then I run off into the world, trying to help those things come to into being.

But I’ve been missing something lately.  I have not been making space and time for contemplation and ecstasy.  I have not been giving God, or myself, room for encounter.  And it is intimate encounter with God that truly transforms us.  It is contemplation and ecstasy that give us the spiritual fuel to reveal the heart of God to this broken and hurting world.  In the words of Mother Teresa of Calcutta, “It is by prayer that the soul draws directly from the heart of God the graces that the active life must distribute.”  Contemplation and ecstasy are integral to life of genuine transformation and impact.

We need to make time and space to dance with him, to listen to him, to laugh with him.  We need to sit quietly with him, to sing and to be sung to, to hold and be held, to kiss and be kissed.  Those are the encounters that give our lives the intimacy and the power to help others find that tender and intimate and transforming space with him as well.  When was the last time you just sat still and let him love you?  After all, “We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)     

soon

centuries have come and gone

darkness and groaning pervade

but hang on, dear ones

it won't be long now

the journey through the valley of weeping

will soon burst into a season of great joy

the light will come, angels will sing

and the Savior will be born

so hang on, dear ones

it won't be long now

wait for the Lord

be strong and take heart

and wait for the Lord

conversions

Walking with God is a journey, an invitation to travel from nothing to nothing.  It is a pilgrimage that takes us from nothing, only to lead us back again.  This time to a very different kind of nothing.  It is the journey from a nothing that is totally self-consumed, to a nothing that is devoid of self, because it is filled with him.  No more me.

But there are several conversions along the way.  The conversion from fear to love, from “I’m afraid I’m nothing” to “I am beloved.”  Then the conversion from beloved to our kingdom self, where God lets us know our specific place and purpose in a wonderfully unique and intimate way.  And finally, the conversion from our kingdom self back to nothing in a totally different way.  We become nothing so that he can be all.

All these conversions are necessary, and none can be left out without the whole thing going sideways.  There are no shortcuts in life with God.  In fact, each of these conversions can take decades and require patience and diligence.

Where are you in this pilgrimage?  What conversion are you in the midst of?  And how is God inviting you deeper into this Great Round Dance of Love?

ps 131

O heart, be not proud; O eyes, be not arrogant.  O ego, be dead to the world but alive to your God.  Do not be concerned with bigness or greatness.

O soul, be stilled and quieted.  Rest is the strong and loving embrace of your nurturing God.  Be weaned of need so that you can be free to love.

O hope, be in God alone, both now and forevermore.

setting the stage

the days grow short

darkness dominates

leaves have fallen

trees stand bare

the chill of winter

has taken hold

the season is ripe

for watching and waiting

this dark period is a

necessary preparation

for the coming of the light

come Lord Jesus