given

And taking the five loaves and the two fish he looked up to heaven and said a blessing and broke the loaves and gave them to the disciples to give to set before the people. (Mark 6:41)

Ultimately, we are taken, blessed, and broken in order to be given.  Thus, we have to realize that this life is not about us, it is about God and his Kingdom.  When we really understand that, then all of the other pieces somehow begin to fall into place.  Christ is given to and for us, so that we might be given to him, and then to others. (Mark 12:29-31) 

The more I think about the meaning of living and acting in the name of Jesus, the more I realize that what I have to offer others is not my intelligence, skill, power, influence, or connections, but my own human brokenness through which the love of God can manifest itself.  The celebrant in Leonard Bernstein's Mass says: "Glass shines brighter when it's broken...I never noticed that."  This, to me, is what ministry and mission are all about.  Ministry is entering with our human brokenness into communion with others and speaking a word of hope.  This hope is not based on any power to solve the problems of those with whom we live, but on the love of God, which becomes visible when we let go of our fears of being out of control and enter into His presence in shared confession of weakness.

     The great paradox of ministry, therefore, is that we minister above all with our weakness, a weakness that invites us to receive from those to whom we go.  The more in touch we are with our own need for healing and salvation, the more open we are to receive in gratitude what others have to offer us. (Gracias! by Henri J.M. Nouwen)

broken

And taking the five loaves and the two fish he looked up to heaven and said a blessing and broke the loaves and gave them to the disciples to give to set before the people. (Mark 6:41)

I am more and more convinced that until we fully realize the fact that we really have no idea what we are doing we will never be of any value to God, or to anyone else for that matter.  That's where brokenness comes in.  After Jesus takes us, and blesses us, he then must break us.  Unfortunately the breaking is a necessary part of the process.  It is only in the breaking that we realize that we can't do it on our own.  It is only in the breaking that we discover that we don't have the resources, in and of ourselves, to give the people in our lives and in our world what they most desperately need and most deeply long for.  It is only in the breaking that we recognize our total dependence on God.  It is only in the breaking that we can be multiplied enough to be given.  A very wise friend once told me, "You can't be multiplied enough to be given, you can only be broken enough to be given."  Somehow it is in the breaking that the multiplication happens.  So much so that, in the end, a crowd of up to ten thousand people had eaten until they were satisfied and there were still twelve basketfuls of broken pieces left over (Mark 6:42-43).  Thanks be to God.

blessed

And taking the five loaves and the two fish he looked up to heaven and said a blessing and broke the loaves and gave them to the disciples to give to set before the people. (Mark 6:41)


After he takes the loaves from the disciples, he blesses them.  This is the second movement in the dance of faith.  After God takes us to (and for) himself, he blesses us.  It is a phrase that we hear all the time.  In fact, it is one we hear so much that I'm afraid it has lost its meaning.

To bless someone is to invoke life into them.  Dallas Willard said it so beautifully when he said, "Blessing is the projection of good into the life of another.  It isn't just words.  It is actually putting forth your will for the good of another person.  You bless someone when you will their good under the invocation of God.  You invoke God on their behalf to support the good that you will for them.   This is the nature of blessing.  It is what we are to receive from God and then give to one another."  So after God takes us to (and for) himself, he blesses us.  He speaks words of life and affection and goodness deep into our souls.  It is this that inspires, renews, energizes, captures, and transforms us.  God draws us tenderly to himself and infuses his goodness and love and affection into us by his Spirit. 

Numbers 6:24-26 is maybe the most classic example of blessing.  In Numbers 6 we find the blessing that Moses instructed his brother Aaron to place on the people of Israel.  And what a blessing it is! "The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace."   It's almost as if Moses is saying, "May God continuously bring his good into your life (bless).  May me protect you and build his hedge of protection around (keep) you.  May his face always shine upon you, transforming you more and more into his image, and causing your face, in turn, to shine with his glory.  May his gracious favor be poured out upon you and well up within you.  May the smile of his face (countenance) be ever upon you.  And may he restore you to the wholeness (peace) you were intended for.  Pretty great words, huh?  God's words of life being infused into our very being.

So may we draw near to God and receive his blessing, this day and every day.  And may we, in turn, bless others with the goodness and the life and the affection and the peace he has blessed us with.

taken

And taking the five loaves and the two fish he looked up to heaven and said a blessing and broke the loaves and gave them to the disciples to give to set before the people. (Mark 6:41)


He has taken us to himself.  It is the first step in the dance of faith.  He takes us to himself again and again and again.  It is what the saints call union; that deep, intimate union that we all were created for and most deeply long for.  It is what gives the rest of the dance its life and meaning, its depth and substance.  It is this intimate taking of us to himself that leaves us completely taken with him in return.  Without this step, ministry is hollow and superficial.  Without this step we cannot fruitfully arrive at the final step, being given.  Without first being taken the seed planted within us will never grow into the beautiful, fruitful plant it was meant to be, but will instead stagnate or die or wither or fade.  For it is his love that compels us, Paul tells us in 2 Corinthians 5:14.  This life of love that God has planted within us is meant to provide the life and energy for all we do.  Thus, our desire to be given cannot last without this love kindled (and continually rekindled) deep in our hearts and souls.  Therefore, we need to continually make time and space to be taken by him: to listen to his whispers of affection, to feel the tender touch of his hands, to receive his passionate kiss upon our lips, to know the deep intimacy of his abiding presence.  It is what brings us to life on the inside.  And it is what offers life to all who cross our paths.

behind

     From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.
     Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him, "Never Lord!" he said.  "This shall never happen to you!"
     Jesus turned and said to Peter, "Get behind me, Satan!  You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men." (Matthew 16:21-23) 


I don't know about you, but it is easy for me at times to get ahead of myself.  To move and act and live life before I have really reflected and thought and prayed about the life I most want to live.  And it is also easy, in this life of faith, to get ahead of God at times as well.  It is easy for us to charge ahead with our plans and schemes and agendas--for the kingdom, mind you--without really listening and seeking and getting direction from God.  Glad to see that I am not alone.  Peter had the same problem.  So much so that when Jesus told him what was to come, he adamantly disagreed with him--even rebuked him--because those plans did not agree with his own.  That's where the "Get behind me, Satan!" part comes in.  Peter had charged ahead when the place he needed to be was firmly behind; behind Jesus.  And Jesus reminded him of that, quite boldly I might add.  It is so easy to charge ahead sometimes; to follow our own plans for how we think things should work and should go and should be.  There is a great danger for us when that happens.  For when we charge ahead actually become a stumbling block to him, rather than a follower.  For ours is not to charge ahead, ours is always to follow closely behind.  What will that look like for us today?

    

pull

You will do well so to regulate your time that you may have every day a little leisure for reading, meditation, and prayer, to review your defects, to study your duties, and to hold communion with God.  You will be happy when a true love to Him shall make this duty easy.  When we love God, we do not ask what we shall say to Him.  We have no difficulty in conversing with a friend.  Our hearts are ever open to Him.  We do not think what we shall say to Him, but we say it without reflection.  We cannot be reserved.  Even when we have nothing to say to Him, we are satisfied with being with Him.  Oh how much better are we sustained by love than by fear!  Fear enslaves, constrains, and troubles us; but love persuades, consoles, animates us,; possesses our whole soul, and makes us desire goodness for its own sake.
                                                                                               ~Francois Fenelon



Fear and love.  The two great motivators.  One motivates by push: ought, should, guilt, shame.  And one motivates by pull: desire, longing, persuasion, affection.  In the words of Francois Fenelon, one enslaves, constrains, and troubles and one consoles, animates, and possesses.  Both have their place and time to do their particular work, I suppose.  But, in my experience, as far as true and lasting change is concerned, pull seems to produce the best fruit.  At least it has in me anyway.  Pull is that wooing of God, that way he draws us to himself.  It is a deep romancing, if you will.  Pull captures our hearts, and our imaginations, and totally transforms our lives.  It invites us into intimate union (always more intimate union) with God.  And it is this intimacy that changes everything.  When I am seized by the power of the Great Affection everything within me is affected.  My life is totally captured by a Love that makes me want to please my Beloved in all I do.  It is a love so big that it begins to purge me of all other (less wild) loves.  Instead of trying to change by grit and effort and determination (the American way), I am changed by simply being in love.  The romancing of a God who is crazy-in-love-with-me makes me fall more and more deeply in love with him in return.  Thomas Chalmers, a Scottish minister from the 1800's, called it The Expulsive Power of a Great Affection.  I like that.  It is only a larger, Greater Affection that can capture our hearts and turn us away from the a smaller, more trivial, affections that tend to consume, corrode, and occupy our lives.  When we take the entire burden of change upon ourselves, it is, indeed, much too heavy to bear.  It is both exhausting and overwhelming.  But when we surrender our hearts to the love of the One who invites us to "Come unto me, all you who are weary and heavy laden," and "take my yoke upon you," we discover that this way of love (pull) is actually the way to "find rest for our souls."  Because the burden of change is no longer solely upon us, but rather falls upon him.  Thus, the words, "You will be happy when a true love to Him shall make this duty easy."   Thanks be to God!

one life

Here's a question for you: Would you say you are living a divided life or a unified life these days?  It is a question I've been thinking a lot about for the past couple of weeks; both because of what I sense in myself, as well as what I have been noticing in those around me.  It is so easy at times, due to the demands and chaos of life, to live in a reactionary type of way that views life as a collection of disconnected parts that have to be managed and attended to, rather than viewing it as one unified whole.  And I am coming to find out more and more that how we see things makes a significant difference in how we live things.

What about you?  When you stop and reflect on the life you are currently living, what feelings arise?  Do you feel more divided or more unified?  If you're still not sure, maybe this question can give you another hint: Are you typically overwhelmed and exhausted or are you typically energized and engaged?

My kids loved playing with Legos when they were little.  There is a distinctive sound that occurs when a child is rummaging through a container of Legos looking for just the right one to complete his masterpiece.  And that noise was a constant in our house for many years.  In fact, one year my youngest son asked for a Lego Pirate Ship for Christmas, which he got.  And I still remember his excitement as we opened up the box and looked at the enormous amount of pieces (756, to be exact) that were somehow necessary to create this object of his delight.  Now I'll have to admit that while his dominant emotions were sheer joy and utter excitement, I was a bit overwhelmed, and somewhat paralyzed, by the seeming enormity of the task ahead.  "How in the world will I be able to turn all of these separate pieces into something that resembles the impressive structure pictured on the front of the box?"  It was exhausting to think about.  You see, I've never been one that is particularly gifted in the area of building and construction.  Nevertheless, we waded in to the project together.  And as we began assembling the (as yet) mythical pirate ship, something happened within me.  Somehow I stopped seeing it as 756 parts and started seeing it as one thing.  A thing of beauty.  And when that shift in my seeing took place, the feelings of being overwhelmed and paralyzed began to vanish and a sense of excitement and energy began to grow within me.  I became totally engaged in the process.

We all have a tendency, I think, to see our lives that way.  We tend to see them as 756 separate pieces rather than seeing them as one unified whole.  I mean, there are just so many parts to manage: faith, ministry, work, family, school, friendships, etc., etc., etc.  All of which we tend to treat separately (compartmentalization) rather than treating them together as one whole, unified life.  And when we live life this way it is both overwhelming and exhausting.  I mean, who can possibly balance all of those things at once?  It reminds me of the guy on TV that balances the spinning plates on top of sticks and constantly runs from one to the other trying to keep any of them from falling off and crashing to the ground (Plate Spinning).  It seems like an impossible task.  Even life and ministry become two separate parts rather than one unified whole, which is a tragedy.  And not at all what Jesus had in mind (As you go, make disciples...Matthew 28:19). 

I suspect that God's vision and desire for our lives is much different, and much greater, than that.  I think that God desires us to see life as one thing rather than as 756 things.  And when we start recognizing the fact that life is really about one thing it simplifies everything.  It allows us to breathe a little rather than continually running breathlessly about.  When we begin to see life as one thing (a thing of beauty) we begin to be engaged and energized rather than overwhelmed and exhausted.  And that one thing is the same one thing Jesus spoke to Martha about in Luke 10.  That one thing is this: living life with God.  That's it!  In its most simple terms, all of this life is about this one thing: just live life with God.  Everything else will take care of itself.  Because when we do that there is a wholeness and a purpose and a vision and a unity to our lives.

A great example of this can be seen in Jeremiah 6:16: "Thus says the Lord, 'Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.'"  Within these 33 words is a wonderful pattern that shows us what it looks like to simply live one life with God--wherever we go, whoever we are with, whatever we do.  In fact, it is a pattern I have adopted over the past few years that seems to make good and fruitful space for the Spirit of God to speak and to lead and to guide in all areas of my life and ministry, if I will continually live from it.

It all starts with stand.  In other words start by stopping.  Stand.  Be still.  Be present--fully present.  First to God within you, and then to God around you.  In other words, show up.  I believe it was Woody Allen that once said, "Eighty percent of life is just showing up."  Show up with God and show up with others.  That's where it all starts.

Next comes look. Stand at the crossroads and look.  Pay attention.  Look for God.  Look deeply for him in whatever, or whoever, might be in front of you at the moment.  Look past the surface.  Look into the depths.  Search.  Seek.  Seek him in all things.

Then comes ask.  Specifically, ask God.  Ask God, "What are you up? What are you up to within me?  What are you up to around me?  What are you up to in this circumstance?  What are you up to in the life of the person in front of me?  Ask.  Ask for the ancient paths.  The ancient paths are those well-worn paths that lead straight to the heart of God.  Those paths that multitudes of other saints, poets, and pilgrims have traveled well before us.  In fact, whenever we see someone walking deeply and intimately with God we need to take note because that person has found these ancient paths, and watching them can show us the way into the heart of God.  Solitude, silence, prayer, scripture, etc.,these things, indeed, are a significant part of the good way. 

Notice that, up until now, we still have not moved.  We are still in one place (stand, look, ask), seeking God's heart, mind, and direction.  And it is not an easy thing to do because our default mode of operation is movement.  Our norm is don't just stand there, do something.  We tend to operate (whether we like to admit it or not) out of a "ready, fire, aim" mentality.  Which, in all likelihood, leads to a significant amount of wasted motion.  Our default, it would seem, needs to change more to a don't just do something, stand there mindset.

And finally, once we have stood and looked and asked, it is time to move.  Walk in it is the phrase Jeremiah uses.  Walk in the good way, whatever that may mean.  For, once we have received our direction and guidance from God, it is time to enter into whatever he is doing.  It is time to move toward him (and his work) whatever that may look like.  Sometimes it will mean speaking a word he has given us to speak and sometimes it will mean keeping our mouths shut.  Sometimes it will mean simply being present and sometimes it will mean reaching out to embrace.  But whatever it is, we can be sure of its power, substance, and authenticity because it has come directly from his heart and not merely our own.

And the result is incredible: you will find rest for your souls.  No longer exhausted and overwhelmed, we will be energized and engaged by the winds of God's Spirit.  We will no longer be divided, but unified and at peace because we are just trying to do the one thing rather than the 756.  Thanks be to God!