Absorbed. Ouch! Hits me right between the eyes. If I am honest, I have to admit that not a day goes by when it doesn't happen to me. At some point each day (or multiple points each day) I get so caught up in what's either in front of me, or ahead of me, that I lose touch entirely with God's presence within me, and what he is doing around me. I don't know that I would have called it dozing off, because it appears so active. But that's exactly what it is. It is getting so consumed with myself, and my agenda, that I fall asleep on God. I get distracted and sidetracked by the things on my list and fail to even ask what might be on his. I think that's probably the definition of absorbed.
So how do I combat this tendency? How do I wake up to God and fall asleep to myself? How can I be up and awake to what God is doing? I think the answer is easy; and really hard. I pay attention. I begin my day with God and I set alarms within my day that will bring my heart and my soul and my mind back to God in case I fall asleep. I set something on my phone or I stick something in my car to remind me of his love and his presence. I plant a word or a phrase or a psalm in my heart and let it take root there for the day. I remember it every time it comes to mind, and recite it to myself. I say the words of the ancient prayer and listen for the prayer of God that rises in my heart. I set concrete times within the day where I will stop and return to him, just as the saints and poets and pilgrims have been doing for centuries. I frame my day with the prayer; the prayers the Church has been praying since the beginning of time. For this is not a new problem.
And if I do all of that then maybe, just maybe, when I lay my head on my pillow at night, I will be able to smile. I will think back and be grateful for an awareness of God's presence and his work that has helped me to align myself more and more with his will rather than just my own.
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