justifying myself

it's amazing
how little it takes
to put me in a spin
a downward spiral
straight down the rabbit hole
to that dark place
i know so well

just moments ago
the sun was shining
the day was clear and free
but then a sour chord was struck
and the next thing i know
boom here i am
at the bottom of the abyss
walls too steep and high
to climb out of
on my own

i thought i was
past all of this by now
i thought i'd have
finally learned
how to live
rooted and free
in the light of
truth and love

when will i ever
be fully convinced
of the truth
you long for me
to know
and live out of

to know that truth
in such a way
that these tumbles
into the pit of
darkness and despair
don't happen any more

o how i long for that day




Father of all humanity, you call your children to walk in the light of Christ.  Free us from darkness and keep us forever in the radiance of your truth, until we come at last to live with you on high.  We ask this through our Lord Jesus Christ your Son, who lives and reins with you and the Holy Spirit, one God forever and ever.  Amen. (The Little Book of Hours)