What if the main reason we fail to love God as we ought is because we are afraid to be fully loved by him? The scriptures make it clear that we love because he first loved us (1 John 4:19), so our love for him can only be a reflection of and response to our own first-hand knowledge of his divine love for us. Thus, if we fail to encounter and experience God’s love fully, then we will fail to love him fully in return.
But why on earth would we be afraid to experience the passion, depths,
and delight of God’s extravagant love? Who
knows? Maybe it’s too intense. Maybe we are afraid it will be too much for
us. As a dear friend of mine once said, “If
God was any more intimate with me, I don’t think I could stand it.” Or maybe it’s too demanding. Maybe it requires something of us that we are
not sure we will be able to give. That
kind of love can only be experienced through total surrender and wild
abandon. Unfortunately, surrender and abandon
have never been our strong suit. Or
maybe it’s all about control. Maybe our hesitation
to be fully loved by God has more to do with the fact that his love just puts
us so out of control. As a friend and
mentor used to pray, “O Lord, I want to know the depths of your delight and
affection, but please promise to be gentle with me.”
We want passionate intimacy with God, but it also kind of scares us. We are drawn to it and hesitant of it at the
same time. Yet, our only hope of ever
being able to love God as we ought,
lies in us opening ourselves up to being fully loved by him. It will come only when we are able to truly
pray, “Here I am, O Lord, have your way with me.”
O Lord, unless I let you fully love me, I will never be able to fully love you. Give me the courage and the grace and the strength to let you have your way with me. Amen.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)
I have a sneaking suspicion that the reason we do not experience the
rest that Jesus offers is because we simply refuse to do so. I don’t know, maybe it’s pride, maybe it’s
fear, maybe it’s need, maybe it’s control, or maybe it’s all of the above, but
for some reason we consistently refuse the rest that God calls us to.
Just look at the scriptures. “This
is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel says: ‘In repentance and
rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would
have none of it.’” (Isaiah 30:15) Or, “This is what the Lord says: ‘Stand at
the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is,
and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.’ But you said, ‘We will
not walk in it.’” (Jeremiah 6:16) Or, “There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for
the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from his own
work, just as God did from his. Let us,
therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by
following their example of disobedience.” (Hebrews 4:11)
But why on earth would we refuse to enter into God’s rest? I think Matthew 11:28-30 holds a bit of a clue. In order to enter into God’s rest we must first
come to him, which few of us seem to have
a problem with, and then we must take his
yoke upon us, which is much more difficult.
That’s because we can’t take on his yoke, until we have taken off our
own, whatever it may be. That seems to
be where the refusal comes in, we are simply unwilling to take off our own yoke
in order to take on the light and free and well-fitting yoke of Jesus. Therefore, we are forever burdened and weary
and exhausted from continually trying to do it ourselves.
Basically it all comes down to trust. Do we really trust that God is enough for us, and that he will give us everything we need? Love, affirmation, significance, security, etc. And do we really believe that God is wise enough and loving enough and powerful enough to take care of things without us? Or maybe that’s the issue, maybe we are terrified that he will. Who knows?
Whatever the case, each of us must face our own resistance to God’s rest, as well as our refusal to enter into it. And after we face it, we must name it. Then we must repent of it. We must be willing to take off our own yoke and take on his. Otherwise, we will never experience the rest and the peace and the wholeness he created us for.
Lord Jesus, why on earth would I every refuse to enter into your rest? Yet I do. Maybe it is because I’m so afraid of what will happen if I stop. But my real fear, I suppose, should be what will happen if I don’t. Lord, have mercy. Amen.
Don’t give fear, anxiety, and insecurity the power to steal your joy, your laughter, and your freedom today. “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”
Fear, anxiety, and insecurity are some of the main predators of the
spiritual life. They will eat up all of
your joy and your life and your freedom if you let them. Don’t let them; that’s the key. It’s why Paul tells the Galatians to “Stand
firm.” You are not powerless in this
struggle. You have the Spirit of God
living within you.
Lord Jesus, give me the strength and the grace and the courage to stand firm whenever something, or someone, tries to rob me of my joy and laughter and freedom. You desire me to live freely, and you give me the power to do so. Help me to live in that truth. Amen.
If “It is finished” the way Jesus says it is (John 19:30), then why do I tend to live as if it is not? Why do I continue to live with the feeling that somehow I still have to earn God’s favor? Why do I still live as if my value and my worth were still up for grabs? Why do I continue to live my life desperately trying to prove that I am worth loving? Why do I continue to allow fear and insecurity and anxiety to control me and rob me of joy and freedom? Why do I still live so much of my life out of need, rather than out of love?
If “It is finished,” then all of this has already been settled. Everything is just grace and gratitude.
Thank you, Lord Jesus, that it really is finished. Help me to live in the joy and freedom of that truth today. Amen.
In biblical times, marriages were basically arranged. But the participants did have some say in the final outcome. If the groom-to-be was on board with the arrangement, he would go to his future bride’s house and offer her a cup of wine. It was his way of saying, “I choose you.” And if the bride was also in agreement with the arrangement, she would then drink the wine, basically saying, “And I choose you.”
After that, the groom would then go back to his father’s house and begin to build a room onto it, where he and his new bride would live. When all the work was finally completed, the father of the groom would give the okay and the groom-to-be would then make his way back to his future bride’s house. At that time the bridesmaids, who had been watching and waiting for the groom’s return, would announce his coming. Then the bride-to-be would go out to meet her groom and everyone would process back to the groom’s house where the wedding feast would begin.
One of the really beautiful parts of this whole process was what the groom would say at his proposal, after the wine had been offered and accepted. He would say, “Bride to be, in my Father’s house there are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you may also be where I am.”
These are the very words Jesus chose to use in order to tell his followers what one day awaited them—a celebration. A wedding feast. You see, God wants intimate union with us. Union so deep that only the delights of marriage can begin to capture it. He wants more than just a dutiful, distant relationship. He wants passion. He wants longing. He wants unbridled affection. That is the kind of life God wants both for and with each of us. All we have to do is say, “I do.” All you have to do is say yes to love.
(from my new book Into the Heart of God: A Journey with Jesus through the Gospel of John, which will hopefully be out in the next few weeks.)
